Ode to Judge Roy Moore

Have you heard the stories about Alabama Judge Roy Moore?

He likes to take his dates to the toy store.

The things that he can buy the children are on a full display like a panorama.

Wait a minute!  He’s about to become the new US Senator in Alabama.

He is disqualified from remaining a judge.

He’s staying in the race.   That was not a typo or a smudge.

For some reason, he continues to remain so mean.

Maybe it’s because when he was 32, he was messing with girls that were 14.

Even Sam Cooke would be impressed if he read your file,

Mohammed and Moore have something in common; they were both pedophiles.

Then, to prove that the entire state of Alabama is filled with insanity,

The only person that interviewed him after the allegations was Sean Hannity.

This guy should find a place to remain out of the spotlight.  Go hide!

Stay away from children like that.  War Eagle, Bammer Jammer, and Roll Tide!

 

 

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Ode to Harvey Weinstein

This dummy is one of the greatest directors during this era of life

Because he sexually assaulted women and lost his marriage with his wife.

For this week, everyone has been taken back on this swerve

When the news revealed to the entire world that Harvey Weinstein is a perv.

How is it that he could produce and direct so many movies

And women still didn’t think that he was groovy.

It’s hilarious that he would offer quid pro quo

And the women would all yell back to him, “Oh, no!”

His face is so contorted that he always looks like he is always grunting.

His dalliances gives a whole new meaning to a movie he diredcted called “Good Will Hunting.”

 

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Ode to Charlottesville

This weekend played out like some cinematography from Cecil B. Demille;

The crazy scene from what occurred in Charlottesville.

A bunch of young Caucasian men went to protest in Virginia.

From watching them on Friday night, even Canadians thought that they were virgins, eh?

They were protesting the taking down of the statue of General Robert E. Lee,

But why did they do this with torches from a tiki?

It’s not surprising that one of the protesters that was out there for the whole night

Was given the name from his parents of Cole White.

Then, things became even stranger on Saturday

When three people should not have died on that day.

They caught the man who drove into protesters.  After taking a look at his bio,

I am not surprised that the person is from Ohio.

Then, plenty of people were mad at President’s Trump response because it wasn’t very national.

Why do people continue to think that he would ever speak in a fashion during a crisis that is rational?

 

 

 

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Ode to Anthony Scaramucci

He served the shortest time ever as White House Communications Director,

Which makes him the worst person to ever serve in the political sector.

We should have seen that this guy was more hype than a tweaker

When he was looking to eliminate each and every leaker.

We quickly saw what the definition of a dweeb is

In that New Yorker article in which he went after Reince Priebus.

The funniest part is about what he said about Steve Bannon

Saying that he could make his own flavor of yogurt that’s not made by Dannon.

For these past two weeks, we were able to witness the hilarity of Anthony Scaramucci,

Whose life has been going downhill instead of being Gucci.

He saw this as being the biggest opportunity of his life,

But during these few days, he received divorce papers from his wife.

This scenario cannot be viewed as funny

Because he probably didn’t have a prenup to protect his money.

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Ode to Sen. Mitch McConnell

He is looking to negotiate the end of healthcare for all.

The only thing that is great in Kentucky is college basketball.

Good evening!  Aren’t you lucky

That you do not live in Kentucky,

Or you would be stuck in a state in which your senators

Would be Beeker from the Muppets and Skeletor.

Instead of looking to keep the entire nation in good health,

Sen. McConnell is looking to hand out tax cuts to those with wealth.

We’re only three years away from 2020,

And we’re stuck with a Senate Majority leader that looks like a politician from the 1830’s.

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Ode to Carlos Mendoza

One of my life goals is to watch his soul be devoured by maggots

He has the nerve to criticize me when he is a f—-t.

How can anyone conclude to be an intellectual

When their sexual preference is homosexual?

Why do homosexuals walk in pride an demean others when basically

They are the ones that choose to have sex incorrectly.

As you can see from the first few lines that this poem is real savage,

But the Mendoza line in baseball means below average.

No matter what kind of circumstances that you are dealing with today

Never choose to cower to someone that is gay.

 

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Ode to Reality Winner

She thought that she would receive accolades like Edward Snowden,

But it turned out that she will end up being a bust like Greg Oden.

In a world which is disillusioned by perceived personalities,

Her parents burdened her with the name of Reality.

Since she’s in jail now, she’s eating food that’s worse than TV dinners.

Which sort of implies that she is not a winner.

She spilled the beans for no reason.  Why was she rushing?

The current investigation was going to reveal that there was some hacking from the Russians.

Instead of making big bucks off of the information intercept,

You gave the data to a podcast called Intercept.

There was absolutely no need to reveal the proof.

History will show that she is a goof.

Her jail time will give her time to reflect upon the penalty of her technicality

Which hopefully gives her a dose of reality.

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